The Start Of A Brand New Season


This week was the start of a brand new season of my life.  I left an amazing full time job to officially launch my new business and focus entirely on TRIESSENCE.

As I prepared to leave and train the people to take over my old role, it occurred to me that this could quite possibly be the end of my experience in the “corporate” world and that I am transitioning over to working for myself, which means leaving the security of having a wonderful job and a supportive team surrounding me in the workplace.

Since I’m trying not to focus on the fears around it (although I could write an entire blog around that), I’ll just say that this is quite possibly the scariest time of my life and I have to remember to keep my thoughts positive on what I do want and continue to have faith and believe that this is exactly what I’m supposed to be doing.

I’ve been dreaming of this for years and it doesn’t matter that I’ve been preparing for it for a couple of years now or that I gave a six month notice to my company that I was working with because I don’t think you are ever quite prepared for the final days at the end and for the reality to sink in that one season is over and a brand new season of my life has now begun.

As I walked around in the ice and snow today in Dallas, Texas, I was reminded of all of the different seasons in our lives and how things can change so quickly.  We don’t get much snow or ice here and when we do, it seems like it always happens so fast and you don’t have much time to prepare.  This time I actually took time to stock up yesterday and buy some food and all that I would need to have in case I was trapped inside for a few days since the city pretty much shuts down when we do get this type of weather.

As I walked out back to check things out this afternoon, my gate was frozen shut to get to the back where my car is parked and I could see through the gate at how frozen my car is as well.  I was very thankful that I prepared ahead of time.  I was then able to choose to walk around the neighborhood and walk over to a cute coffee shop and that’s when I got to snap the beautiful photo above.

I also made the choice to leave my amazing full time job.  It doesn’t make it any less fearful or less sad to leave people that I loved working with so much and to be starting something that is so unpredictable and scary for me to be out on my own.

I could make the choice to worry every day and focus on the fear of not having enough coaching clients or yoga classes or that my business could fail.  Or I can choose to visualize and think about all that I want to accomplish with my new business.  I can think about all of the people that will get introduced to yoga that have never done it before when I bring it to corporations and the people that I can help through coaching them.

I recently learned a helpful tip that I’ve been incorporating before I go to bed.  The things that we focus on right before bed are crucial because our subconscious brain is at work when we are sleeping.  If I go to bed panicking and focusing on what tomorrow will bring and that I’m afraid I could fail, that sets me up to continue to feel that way the next day and let my brain soak that in until morning and quite possibly attract that into my life.  The other choice would be to visualize myself and my clients and students living their lives to their fullest potential and benefiting from the work of TRIESSENCE.  I am going to choose the latter.

Would you be willing to spend the next few nights before you go to bed really paying attention to what you say to yourself before you go to bed and make a conscious decision to set up your subconscious to help you succeed by focusing on the amazing things that you want for yourself?  Then, you must have faith and believe that those things are possible or better yet, believe that they have already happened.  I think we’ll both be amazed at the results.

Happy weekend and hope you all stay warm and cozy.

Eddie Vedder Makes Me Act Like I’m Back In High School


Sometimes I take myself way too seriously and can come across as being a pretty serious person.  Then, sometimes I can act like I’m back in high school.  Eddie Vedder makes me act like I’m back in high school.

I’ve had the privilege of going to quite a few concerts lately.  I have had a wonderful time at all of them and enjoyed the music very much, but if you were watching me from a distance you’d just see me bouncing my legs up and down a little bit and that’s about it.  I could be having the time of my life, but sometimes it’s hard to tell.

And then I went to Pearl Jam last weekend…

It didn’t matter that I’ve seen Pearl Jam live a number of times as well as Eddie Vedder perform two solo tours or that I had the honor of meeting him and having a quick conversation with him back in the 90’s.  I still acted like I was back in high school.

And I tell you what, I had an absolute blast!

I yelled and screamed lyrics and in between songs, danced and even participated in a two person mosh pit.  It was absolutely incredible.

It was a great reminder that I don’t allow myself to let loose enough, be silly and really enjoy myself.  We all need to know the things that make our heart sing and make sure that we give ourselves those gifts every once in a while.

What are some things that cause you to act like you are back in high school and what would it take for you to be able to do one of them?

I hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving and do something that makes you act like you are back in high school!

Vulnerability Is The Birthplace Of Innovation, Creativity And Change


“Vulnerability is the birthplace of innovation, creativity and change.”  

“Imperfections are not inadequacies; they are reminders that we’re all in this together.”

“Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it. Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy—the experiences that make us the most vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light.”

Brené Brown

I was reminded of this beautiful quote from Brené Brown this evening after I decided to have a vulnerable conversation with someone that I care deeply about.  The funny thing about it is the person I was having a conversation with is the same individual that passed along this quote to me a few months ago when it was featured in one of Mastin Kipp’s “The Daily Love” articles.  Mastin shares some great stuff on his blogs.  If you haven’t ever heard of him, it might be worth taking a minute to check him out!

Have you ever felt like if you were to ask everyone that you know for their advice on the way you are wanting to move forward on something that they would all say whatever you do, DO NOT DO what you are wanting to do and the way you are wanting to go about doing it?

Well, that happened to me today.  But, I did it anyway.  And I’m so glad that I did.  You see, today I decided to be totally vulnerable with someone that I care deeply about and I knew it wasn’t going to be pretty, but I did it anyway.  I was shaking and my heart was pounding and I was so nervous about the outcome, but I did it anyway.

And you know what?!  I survived.  And in the end, it turned out to be such a beautiful thing and a wonderful conversation.  I think that sometimes people think that we can share too much with one another and that sometimes things are better left unsaid.  I believe that if something seems so important to you that you know that you will not be able to get through it without sharing, then I disagree.

As long as our vulnerabilities are coming from a place of truth and love and how it is for us vs. blaming the other person, I believe it’s hard for things to go wrong.  Granted the other person has to be open enough to be able to sit with you in your vulnerable state, but if they aren’t, I still believe it’s great to do it anyway so that you can see that and make a decision of whether or not that person is worth someone that you will choose to invest more time in by allowing them in to see your whole self or not.

I am committed to speaking what is true for me as embarrassing or silly that I think that it is and as scary as it may seem that someone could think that I am sharing too much information.

Is there something that you have wanted to say to someone, but you get too nervous or feel too vulnerable to go towards that particular conversation?  I’d like to encourage you to do it anyway.  And even if it doesn’t turn out exactly the way you had in mind and if the other person isn’t open to receiving it, be proud that you put yourself out there anyway and don’t let it make you afraid to do it again.

Because you know what?  One of these days you will be lucky enough to have a situation like I did this evening where the other person totally appreciates you for who you are and is thankful for your honesty and vulnerability.  And that, my friends, can be the start of a very beautiful relationship.

Here’s wishing many beautiful conversations in the near future for each and every one of you.

Do You Know When You Need A Break?


Do you know when you need a break?

I realized today that sometimes I do not.  I had one of the worst days I’ve had in a really long time and I believe that most of it could have been avoided had I just realized that I needed a break.

I’ve had a headache for two days straight and up until about two hours ago, nothing I did helped.  I became extremely irritable yesterday afternoon and it pretty much carried on through this evening.

Even though I felt really bad last night, I still decided to follow through with the plans I had made.  Kind of wishing I could have a redo on that decision because I would now choose to have stayed home.

As a result of not knowing I needed to take a break and allowing myself to do so, it’s been a downhill spiral the past few days.  I’ve been on a short fuse, been hypersensitive, have shut down, been flat out mean to people and was late to an appointment today.  I also didn’t make it on time to a class this afternoon I was going to observe because I didn’t plan ahead well enough for the traffic during prime school zone times.

This caused five people to get the complete wrong impression of me and experience me at 30% of what I’m normally operating from when I’m at my best.

I feel like it cost me alot, but I feel fortunate to have learned such a valuable lesson.  I am committed to knowing when to take a break if I’m not at my best and being OK with not accomplishing all that I had planned for that day or understanding that in some cases it really is OK to back out on plans I have made.  It actually would have been the best thing for all parties involved.

Do you know when you are not at your best and need to take a break vs. feel the need to keep on going?

I’m committed to being aware of this in the future and being OK taking a break.  I’m committed to taking time for myself when I need it to relax and recharge and not feel guilty about it.  And I am committed to being OK saying no, especially when I know that it’s best for all parties involved.  I’d like to challenge you to do the same.  I believe it can potentially prevent alot of unnecessary stress, frustration and misunderstanding.

Are You Really Listening When Other People Speak?


Are you really listening when other people speak?

Do you think about what you are going to say next or actually listen to them?

Lately, I have been observing my listening patterns and I have found two different types of situations where not only did I have a hard time listening to others, but I hardly even gave them a chance to speak.

Typically, I think I’m pretty good at listening. I mean, I am a coach, so let’s certainly hope so, right?!?!

I think alot of us tend to talk alot and not listen when we are afraid we are being misunderstood. I had an experience not too long ago where I think I rattled off for about three hours straight just so the person I was talking to could understand me more and see where I was coming from and in the end I realized I couldn’t even remember the things that they said because I wasn’t even listening and was so focused on when it would be my turn again so I could continue to try and get my points across.

The next type of conversation that I had where I noticed this was with a friend who I consider to be very wise. I had alot going on one night when we were having dinner and I did the same thing.  I rattled on and on for hours without barely giving her a chance to speak.

Luckily, in this case, when the “wise one” spoke, I actually still heard it, but I never once stopped and said, “hey, what’s going on with you that we can talk about” and you know sometimes wise ones need to talk and need someone to listen to them also! So later I went back and have given her a free pass to a night to talk all about her where I have promised not to steal the conversation.

What types of conversations do you not give people a chance to speak or where when they do, you are not listening?

Next time you are at dinner with someone or having a nice long conversation, pay attention to how well you are listening. When we are thinking about what we are going to say next or wondering if there will be uncomfortable silence and thinking about what kind of brilliant question we could ask next or comparing something someone said to a story in our own lives, we are NOT listening.

Most people are afraid of going into a conversation not knowing where it will lead. Would you be willing to go into your next long conversation with absolutely no agenda? Nothing you want to share. Nothing specific you want to know. Just let the conversation unfold.

People give you information to talk about if you just listen. If you let someone complete their thoughts without interrupting them and are purely listening, when they are finished speaking, you will know the next thing to say or have a great question to ask. And I challenge you to make it a question vs. a thing to say. If you ask someone one or two more questions about something they just said, I think you’ll be amazed at some of the beautiful things you can learn. But first, you must be willing to just listen.

“Most conversations are simply monologues delivered in the presence of a witness.”

– Margaret Millar