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I got married Friday…are you happy about it?
What an odd question, right?
What I mean by that is what does something like a happy moment like this for me bring up for you? Are you happy and excited for me or do you have any thoughts around how you wish you were married or engaged, wish your relationship was still fresh and new or even thinking that I’m crazy for getting married!?!?
And, what do you want for yourself?
Because if you want a relationship or you want marriage and you look at people who are right in the middle of it and you have any other feeling other than joy and happiness for that person, you just might be causing a relationship to be further and further out of reach for you. Or, at least a really healthy one or one that you will want long term.
Let me back up a minute so this doesn’t sound like I’m coming from a harsh place as I want this to come from the most loving place as possible…
I was listening to webinar recently about huge business and financial success and I loved that what I gathered from it was the reminder that if those things are something that you want and when you see others that have it that if we are happy for them, we can attract that even closer to ourselves. Like attracts like. And yes, I believe in prayer and timing and all sorts of other things too, but I also know without a doubt in my mind that like attracts like. If we are having the best day of our life, we come in contact with other happy people. If we are negative Nelly, somehow we come in contact with negative people. And the list goes on and on.
My favorite thing that this guy said (from memory, so butchered a bit I’m sure and I so wish I could remember his name to reference him here!) was if you look at the guy driving the Porsche and you have any sort of negative views around people with money and stereotypes such as people with money are bad people in any way and you want to be a good person, then you will never be as wealthy and successful as you want to be because what you want and what you think and believe don’t match up. Or if you obviously think that you could never afford something like that, more than likely you won’t ever be able to. He suggested thinking “wow, he must have done a lot of great things for people to be able to afford a car like that” instead and I loved that!
I met my husband (oh my gosh, I can’t believe I just typed husband!) when I was in the healthiest place I’ve ever been in in my life emotionally and spiritually and it is no surprise to me that I attracted someone that also was in that healthy space. And yes, it might have taken me years of personal development to get in that space and not so much for him, but hey, we are all different, right!?!?!? 😉
But, for about a year before we met, I was surrounded by people a lot younger than I am getting married and I could have easily slipped into the whole mindset of “I’m going to be alone”, “I’m getting too old”, etc.
But, you know what? I wanted a relationship and I dreamed of a healthy relationship with so much love and respect for one another and there was never an ounce of doubt in my mind that I was not going to have a beautiful one. And I do.
And, I do.
With tears of joy and wishing you the same…
Photo credit: Emily Davis – http://emilydavisphoto.com Taken at our engagement on a rooftop in Denton, Texas 🙂
What do you do when the power goes out?
I’ve been without power since yesterday around 4:30 PM. I kept thinking it would come back on, but it hasn’t.
The storms in Texas have caused hundreds of thousands of people to be without power the past few days and it sounds like 100,000 homes are out just in the area I live in alone, in Dallas.
Driving around to try and catch a yoga class last night seemed impossible. And actually it was because I didn’t make it in time. Most of the stoplights were out. I had people jet out in front of me running these imaginary stoplights and it seemed that frustrated people were all around. Once I made it to where I wanted to go, I couldn’t even find a parking place because the shopping center was so packed with people circling around three floors of a parking garage to find a space, so I just left and went to eat dinner instead.
It took my boyfriend 3 hours to get home last night and it took my sister an hour and 1/2 to drive a mile and 1/2. She had her 2-year-old little girl in the car and had to get creative on how to entertain her. She picked up dinner in the car and just improvised with what was in front of her until she got home. Smart woman 🙂
It was hot last night and a little hard to sleep, but it made me think about all of the things that we take for granted and it made my gratefulness journal easy to write in this morning. I am grateful that I have a comfortable bed to sleep in and that I can find rest. I am grateful that I have electricity (normally ;). I am grateful that I have things that keep me warm and cool me off when I sleep. I am grateful that we have the ability to switch a switch on the wall and can automatically see much better. It’s amazing how even after hours of walking around with a flashlight and seeing by candlelight, you still switch it on out of habit over and over again. It made me laugh each time.
We can complain, get worked up in traffic, yell, scream and get frustrated and feel like crap or we can decide to enjoy the silence when lying in bed thinking about what it was like for people back in the day when they had no electricity and count all the things we have to be grateful for and look forward to when we have it again. I’m choosing the latter.
So, as I sit here on a hard bench in a restaurant in a tiny spot where I could find an outlet to charge my phone, be on my computer and get wifi, I’m grateful that I could find a place to get some work done. I’m also choosing to find things I can appreciate about the others surrounding me that our in the same situation I am after catching myself from starting to be annoyed that their voices were too loud and annoying because they were so close to me 🙂 I promise life is much more fun this way.
What can you choose to be grateful for despite your circumstances today?
A couple of weeks ago I did something that I knew would scare me and I had to use mind over matter to get through it. Which reminds me, I was preparing for this “something” and chose to skip my bi-weekly blog, so my sincere apologies if you happened to notice.
I taught a 9 hour workshop on “Fulfilling Relationships” and knew that I would be up in front of the room in front of some people I had just met that morning speaking for an entire day. That wasn’t what scared me the most though.
I had a few people I did know attending, two of which I knew I wanted to give some feedback to and one that I planned on doing some heavy duty work with and I knew that it would benefit that person greatly, but it made me quite nervous.
As a result of my nerves being turned up to high, I began getting a migraine (which is extremely rare for me) and my feet were killing me from walking around in heels. I had to just mind over matter it because I knew in the end, if I did, I would be so grateful for the opportunity, learn a ton from it and that it would be easier next time. The cool thing is I do want there to be a next time.
At the same time I was doing my workshop, my boyfriend was riding a 100 mile bike race in about 100 degree weather. He has done quite a few of those in his life, but he too was having to use “mind over matter” during his ride and talked about the ways he had to talk himself out of stopping and how he was able to keep going through mind over matter despite any cramping or thinking he was going to have to quit at times.
Would you be willing to take on a challenge and come up with something that scares you or would push you to your edge and see if you could do it anyway?
I can’t say that I would ever be able to do a 100 mile bike ride, unless that was a huge goal of mine and I believe I could find a way to make it happen. I do know though that I was able to get through something that I was afraid of doing by pushing through it knowing that the people in that room came to learn something and I wanted them to get what they came for and I sure hope that they did.
Once it was over and I got plenty of rest, I was able to reflect and celebrate the joy of doing something that scared me. And you know what? I didn’t die. I didn’t fall. I didn’t stop. I didn’t not know what I was doing, which has been a reoccurring fear of mine in the past. And I didn’t have anyone walk out of the course (always a bonus ;)). And most importantly, my two friends are still talking to me and I’m pretty sure still love me 😉
I did however realize I had way too much content and the course needed to be two days long! So, what do you do? You send material via email to the participants afterwards and note to self for next time to extend the time frame or to make it into two different courses. Had I not just done the course without having it all perfectly figured out, I may have never done the course. And now I have the confidence to do another one.
Wishing you opportunities to learn and grow and the possibility of needing to use mind over matter to get yourself through a tough or scary time in your life in order to live your life to your fullest potential.
Until next time…
Photo credit, Hal Samples: www.halsamples.com
This week was the start of a brand new season of my life. I left an amazing full time job to officially launch my new business and focus entirely on TRIESSENCE.
As I prepared to leave and train the people to take over my old role, it occurred to me that this could quite possibly be the end of my experience in the “corporate” world and that I am transitioning over to working for myself, which means leaving the security of having a wonderful job and a supportive team surrounding me in the workplace.
Since I’m trying not to focus on the fears around it (although I could write an entire blog around that), I’ll just say that this is quite possibly the scariest time of my life and I have to remember to keep my thoughts positive on what I do want and continue to have faith and believe that this is exactly what I’m supposed to be doing.
I’ve been dreaming of this for years and it doesn’t matter that I’ve been preparing for it for a couple of years now or that I gave a six month notice to my company that I was working with because I don’t think you are ever quite prepared for the final days at the end and for the reality to sink in that one season is over and a brand new season of my life has now begun.
As I walked around in the ice and snow today in Dallas, Texas, I was reminded of all of the different seasons in our lives and how things can change so quickly. We don’t get much snow or ice here and when we do, it seems like it always happens so fast and you don’t have much time to prepare. This time I actually took time to stock up yesterday and buy some food and all that I would need to have in case I was trapped inside for a few days since the city pretty much shuts down when we do get this type of weather.
As I walked out back to check things out this afternoon, my gate was frozen shut to get to the back where my car is parked and I could see through the gate at how frozen my car is as well. I was very thankful that I prepared ahead of time. I was then able to choose to walk around the neighborhood and walk over to a cute coffee shop and that’s when I got to snap the beautiful photo above.
I also made the choice to leave my amazing full time job. It doesn’t make it any less fearful or less sad to leave people that I loved working with so much and to be starting something that is so unpredictable and scary for me to be out on my own.
I could make the choice to worry every day and focus on the fear of not having enough coaching clients or yoga classes or that my business could fail. Or I can choose to visualize and think about all that I want to accomplish with my new business. I can think about all of the people that will get introduced to yoga that have never done it before when I bring it to corporations and the people that I can help through coaching them.
I recently learned a helpful tip that I’ve been incorporating before I go to bed. The things that we focus on right before bed are crucial because our subconscious brain is at work when we are sleeping. If I go to bed panicking and focusing on what tomorrow will bring and that I’m afraid I could fail, that sets me up to continue to feel that way the next day and let my brain soak that in until morning and quite possibly attract that into my life. The other choice would be to visualize myself and my clients and students living their lives to their fullest potential and benefiting from the work of TRIESSENCE. I am going to choose the latter.
Would you be willing to spend the next few nights before you go to bed really paying attention to what you say to yourself before you go to bed and make a conscious decision to set up your subconscious to help you succeed by focusing on the amazing things that you want for yourself? Then, you must have faith and believe that those things are possible or better yet, believe that they have already happened. I think we’ll both be amazed at the results.
Happy weekend and hope you all stay warm and cozy.